Modern Dads Are Changing the Face of Fatherhood
Paul Bent is part of a rising trend of involved dads, who are redefining the role of fatherhood. Bent’s commitment to being a positive force in his five-year-old son, Hunter’s life, is emblematic of how modern parenting is evolving. While fatherhood in the past often meant financial support, today’s millennial dads are redefining the role, spending three times more time with their children than fathers did in the 1960s.
A New Kind of Fatherhood
For Bent, fatherhood means not just spending time with Hunter but also fostering a relationship characterized by trust and safety. From football practice to cooking lunch to bedtime stories, Bent ensures that his relationship with Hunter is filled with meaningful interactions. “Just before Hunter goes to sleep, we have this little two or three-minute conversation about his day and how he’s feeling,” Bent says. “That’s the most special bonding time. That’s our core.”
Bent, a regional director of a London-based estate agent, represents a model of fatherhood that is hands-on and invested. He’s both physically present and emotionally available for his son, reflecting a profound shift in how modern fathers engage with their children.
Breaking the Old Model
The model of fatherhood Bent subscribes to starkly contrasts with the traditional roles from generations past when fathers were primarily breadwinners, often distant from child-rearing duties. Bent’s own experience with his distant father shaped his desire to be different for his son. This commitment extends to the smallest details – from avoiding making promises he might not keep to attending neonatal meetings during his partner’s pregnancy.
Instilling Values: The Essence of Modern Parenting
Beyond being present, Bent emphasizes the importance of instilling values in his son. Every morning before school, they repeat their mantra: ‘Be kind, be fair, have respect.’ Bent takes pride in witnessing these values take root in Hunter’s behavior, whether it’s helping out at football practice or reminding a visitor to wipe their feet.
Despite the challenges of parenting and the occasional missteps, Bent finds the rewards invaluable. He cherishes the shared experiences, witnessing his son’s growth, and the bond they’re forging. “What he gives me,” Bent reflects with joy, “is unconditional love.”
Paul Bent is the author of ‘Hellp! I’m going to be a Dad!’, available now.
Fatherhood by the Numbers
- Time fathers in Britain spend with their children has increased by 18% since 2015, from an average of 47 minutes a day to 55 in 2022.
- Compared to the average UK dad in the 70s who did just 22 minutes of childcare a day, today’s dads spend an average of 71 minutes, though mothers still lead with 162 minutes.
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